King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia Bites the Dust

King Abdullah dies at 90. His successor is 79. I hope that’s not his son, or that is one ghetto king. Do the math. Creepy. Otherwise, it’s one really old goat being replaced by another old goat.

10 Worst Things That Can Happen When You’re Sick

1. The fire alarm goes off in your building and doesn’t stop for nearly half an hour. Not only are your ears about to explode, the elevators don’t work, so there’s no escape. The noise, that is. It’s probably a false alarm anyway.

2. You have a sexy lady knock on your door, selling something. You sneeze a massive snot-ball in her hair before you get a chance to turn on the “charm.”

3. People tell you you’re not really that sick and you should go to work. You hock a loogie on their sweater.

4. George Carlin comes back from the dead as your guardian angel, but being touched by an atheist doesn’t work. You’re still sick. And George bailed on you to smoke some weed.

5. You turn on the TV and it’s the Food Network.

6. You wake up in a sea of used kleenex’s.

7. The toilet is broken, but you had to use it anyway. The shower doesn’t work either, so try not to crap your pants.

8. You get a phone call from some nimrod who wants you to complete a survey on food intake and bowel movements.

9. You live a block from the entertainment district and it’s a 2 AM on a Friday night.

10. You blow your nose and it causes you to crap your pants.

Ziauddin Yousafzai: Malala’s Dad and Father of the Year, of Every Year


This guy is legit. Maybe he doesn’t give enough attention to his sons, but in a society dominated by males, he’s got serious stugots pushing women’s rights. Class guy, really look up to him and his daughter, Malala (or Gul Makai – Corn-flower). Is this flower not beautiful? Suits Malala perfectly.


BBC Admits Paris Shooting Faked?


Canada: Home Of the World’s Most Affluent Middle Class


Sorry, Stephen, you’re not getting all the credit for this.

Charlie Hebdo Manhunt Updates – 2 Suspects Killed


False flag? It’s pretty convenient that 2 suspects end up dead. Dead men tell no tales. But let this tragic event not lead us into the temptation of believing all Muslims are bad or that this has anything to do with Islamic faith. It is no more a Muslim attack than are the drone attacks by Obama on innocent civilians in Pakistan Christian.

10 Things That Are Pissing Me Off


1. Nosy co-workers.

2. Tone of voice. I suck at it, but some people REALLY suck at it.

3. Trying to figure out if a corrupt government’s allowing booze to be sold in grocery stores is worth enough to get me to vote for those scumbags. If you ARE going to screw people over, the least you can do is make their liquor more accessible.

4. Political correctness. Looks like I may have to start my own newspaper. Everyone seems terrified of backlash. No moral courage.

5. People who jaywalk and insist on walking slower than an old man with a walker. And if you pass them, expect a gesture signifying their appreciation.

6. Canada’s Stephen Harper’s desperate attempt to emulate George W Bush.

7. Leftovers.

8. Christmas cards. Why aren’t environmentalists on this? They’re killing trees for this stuff!

9. Plenty of Fish, for finding people to reject me over and over again.

10. Women who are out of my league and the abusers they’re with.