You are not alone.

I wasn’t going to touch on this very personal subject, but given the recent suicide of Ms. Amanda Todd and the shooting of Ms. Malala Yousafzai (the ultimate in bullying), I feel my time for silence has past.

It’s a terrible thing to be afraid. You study every facet of your being, fixating on your imperfections, finding very little reason for positivity. The world looks bleak. You contemplate philosophical issues until the pressure in your skull becomes too insurmountable to take. Perhaps the existence of a higher power makes things even worse. The world begins to crumble around you.  The struggle to go on seems fruitless. And yet, you do. For now.

The biggest falsehood we tell ourselves is that nobody else could possibly understand. Nobody else is going through what I am going through. The lies begin to take a stranglehold until you can take it no longer. But the truth will set you free.

Being gimped to shit and overweight can make you one hell of a target, literally and figuratively. You distance yourself from others, afraid they’ll learn your secret. Your underwear is more padded than theirs. You have to shove a tube up your dick just to relieve yourself. Incontinence. Maybe the worst possible thing to endure. It’s the most odiferous prison cell you’ll ever experience. Then you’re the clean up crew. Oh shit. Have to change again.

Lies are like an addiction. At first they ease the pain, then they get out of control and leave you powerless. You’re begging for the only rehab truth can bring. I’ll spoil the surprise for you. Sometimes it DOESN’T get better. Sometimes YOU have to get better on you own and find the will to go on.

I can say I know how it feels, but you wouldn’t believe me anyway. I still haven’t decided whether going on is worth the effort. Many days I am merely alive chemically rather than by will. The truth may set you free, but it will make you miserable first.  But you keep trying. You are not alone.

If there’s a God or any kind of justice under the sky 
If there’s a point, if there’s a reason to live or die 
If there’s an answer to the questions we feel bound to ask 
Show yourself – destroy our fears – release your mask 
Oh yes we’ll keep on trying 
Hey tread that fine line 
Yeah we’ll keep on smiling yeah 
And whatever will be – will be


My Own Thoughts on Ms. Yousafzai’s Struggle

I have had my own cross to bear. Nobody has ever come up and shot me in the head for being a gimp, but many times I wished they had. We take so much for granted in our society and figure that they’ll always be there. We lose our minds if our cell phone loses reception, but try waking up every day wondering if you’ll shit your pants. This might be the day. Or, worse, imagine hiding in a cupboard because you hear gunshots or bombs exploding outside your bedroom window. This might be the day. I can’t imagine that.

I can imagine waking up and finding myself looking for the can with great haste (or worse, the shower and a bottle of Shout). I could imagine, as a kid, waiting for a ride home from school and hearing some smart-assed personal comment; what I cannot is getting a bullet in the head on the way home, although it does happen here, and as a writer, it’s not as if it hasn’t crossed my mind.

Over twenty damn surgeries, diagnoses that would make your head spin, but targeted for death? Well, maybe I’ll wait awhile before I make that assessment. If these posts don’t make your head explode, you may want my brains all over the floor. I can usually see when the worst is coming, be it a surgery or shitting my pants. I think Malala saw it coming, too. She bravely made herself a target and despite all my hospital stays and surgeries, is going through pain and shit I can’t even imagine.

So here’s to you, Ms. Yousafzai. You are a hero. I hope you recover enough that you can appreciate the impact you’ve made in many lives, including mine. Thank you.



This is nuts! Do I believe it? Yes. I wouldn’t put it past the CIA, Mossad or MI6 to do this crap in order to consolidate control of oil and other resources in the middle east. But seriously, WTF? Look at the picture. THAT’S THE GUY!




Publish Site American Veterans Today, a report in which he said that the leader of the “Daesh” Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi, is not only an agent of Mossad, the Israeli named “Simon Elliott” or “Elliott Shimon,” was trained to head the organization Daesh in order to spread chaos in the Arab countries neighboring Israel.

The report, published by the site, the “Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi,” was born to Jewish parents and picked up Israeli intelligence services, to get highly trained to spy, and then been planted in one of the Arab countries to assess the organization “Daesh”, which was published chaos throughout the Arab world and the demolition of states, which increases the chances of Israel’s control over the Middle East region.

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King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia Bites the Dust

King Abdullah dies at 90. His successor is 79. I hope that’s not his son, or that is one ghetto king. Do the math. Creepy. Otherwise, it’s one really old goat being replaced by another old goat.

Ayatollah Khomeini of Iran Busts America for Creating “Islamic jihadists”

Ouch! I know this guy isn’t exactly a freedom lover, but his letter makes some sense and reveals what is really going on. He hopes the kids won’t be as ignorant as their parents and start more wars.

Qualities of Jesus That We Should All Aspire To

If you’re liberal, you may in fact relate to this more than a “Christian Conservative.” In other words, Elizabeth Warren may get it more than Rick Santorum. I am also assuming, based on historical evidence, that Jesus Christ really lived – whether he performed miracles or rose from the dead is not up for debate below.

1. Jesus was the first feminist. At a time when it was only customary for men to talk to women for the purpose of getting laid (wait – just like now!), Jesus, like, ladies, your best gay friend, just wanted to converse and help make the lives of women better. Would Jesus actually attend the Pride Parade? And what kind of stud can get a woman willingly to wash their feet without asking or even hinting?

2. He never mentions anything about “social issues.” He rarely judged anyone. He doesn’t even mention homosexuality or abortion. That’s in the Old Testament.

3. He fought for “the least of these,” the opposite of what the proponents of trickle down economics (Christian Conservatives) do.

4. Jesus indeed had a best girlfriend. I don’t believe there was anything particularly romantic between them (though I really can’t speak for Mary Magdalene – she was a little messed up. Ex-prostitute, etc etc).

5. Every gift Jesus gave (healing, food, etc) was given without expectation of return. Seeing people happy and living their lives for each other as much as themselves was good enough for him.

6. He felt pain, just like the rest of us.

7. He enjoyed a glass of wine. “A little wine for thy stomach’s sake.”

8. If the word “kannebosm” is to be understood by myself, Jesus was a pretty hip dude and maybe we should ponder that when discussing treatment for things like cancer.

9. Women, as referenced in #1, loved the guy. He was, if anything, almost metrosexual. He actually CARED about what these chicks had to say.

10. The only time he ever seemed to get really angry was when the bankers tried to take over the temple. Then he went bad ass on them and wrecked the place. We could use him now against the Rothschild Global Banking System.

Your Online Streaming Sports Fix

Sometimes I have a hard time finding the right feed for my games (the feed out of Vancouver), but typically streaming access is pretty good.

President Obama’s State of the Union With GOP Response

I know posting this probably goes against everything I believe in by going after a story, rather than the story within the story, but I’m also a huge attention whore, so if you’re interested, take a gander. I recommend for a head explosion or some comedy, skip to the 2nd clip and hear what the Republicans have to say about the Speech. You can probably predict everything, though. Obama in a room full of gun-loving Republicans sounds dangerously close to Mississippi Burning all over again.

President Barack Obama VS Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.


Let no one take my words below as prejudice. I am a proponent of free speech and of sarcasm, and if you can’t tell the difference between prejudice and sarcasm, well, do us all a favour – please don’t vote. Ever.

1. They’re both black. Wait, no, one is whole chocolate milk, the other is half and half.

2.  Both are socialists. Wait, no – that’s not true either. Obamacare is NOT socialism and neither are any of Obama’s other policies, unless you’re talking about CORPORATE socialism or corporatism or fascism. He’s a right wing president. Get your facts right. JFK, if you listen to his words and the policies he pushed for, was far more socialist than Obama could hope to be. JFK was undoubtedly a liberal or progressive, while Obama is a neoconservative whose policies are more like Reagan’s and Bush’s than JFK’s. The rich are getting richer, and the poor are getting poorer. Congratulations, you got your old job back! Unfortunately, we have to cut your salary by 1/3 (meanwhile our profits are sky high).

3. MLK was unabashedly antiwar. Obama had to be bitch slapped for killing children in Pakistan by a 17 year old girl.

4. MLK ultimately improved race relations. Obama has caused a rift in the country, and racism is on the rise, particularly in the police force and fascism lurks at every corner.

5. Corporate tax cuts and bailouts for bankers and oil companies? That would be your president. MLK’s head would have exploded at the idea.

6. After all the fearmongering by Fox News that Obama would be radically different than any president in US history, the president has continued many of Bush’s policies, in some cases going further right.

7. The wars never end. Dr. King would NOT be impressed.